dere's only 2 words to describe my day.
pissed + depressed.

somehow i really wonder,
are we reali gurl guides or scouts?
we are we always der one doin all der chores?
freak it man. fark.
dey treated us like some kind of foreign workers.
but thanks ms ho, for helpin us..

im sorry. i said dat i wont shed another tear for you.
but i did. i reali cant take it anyore.
der min you walk pass me, i feel like burstin into tears.
i kept askin myself, are we strangers..?
my heart bleed.. i could control my tears no more..
my mind is tellin me to let go..
while my heart kept repeatin hang on..
im reali sick and tiredd. i dun wan to cry anymore..
but my heart juz cant let you go..

- thanks cheefun for always being dere for me.. sorry for being always upset and disturbin you. but yet you are still so nice and consoled me.. thanks lots.. really.. =))

today is der worst day ever in skool i guess.
althou its short, but its reali unbearable.
in der mornin, sze told me sth. 1st blow.
den, awhile ltr, shurui told me sth. 2nd blow.
yupp. double blow. i had no mood for lessons.
i cried. no one knows. hahas. forget it.

yupp. dats it. i juz reachedd home around half an hr ago.
i went to skool and help mrs tan.
i bought my 1st pair of heels today. gees.
but its reali a difficult task for me to wear it for such a long time.
and sze, jesse n me juz took it out and walk bare-footed.
my legs are achin now. gosh.

yupp. i did sth good juz now to someone hu always bluff me.=p[so sweet lorr.x)]
[you noe hu u r] lalala. you owe me a treat.
i so kind to you yet you always bluff me.. lols. stupid boy.=p kiddin.

i haf no rite to get angry. im a nobody to you..
you haf ur freedom to do watever you wan.
i cant interfere. no rite to be angry..
but all i wan you to noe is,
a small careless act of urs, can make me cry for a nite.
yup. u r innocent. its juz dat im useless.
you are not at fault, im der one to blame.

- gees. cheefun. paiseh larr. sry to be der 1st to back out.. i didnt meant to.. but, i tink i reali cant.. der reason i'll explain to you some other time. mayb i'll dare. but not at dis point of time. =) sry..

*down. =C

hmmm. guess wat? 3 periods of POA today. gosh.
im gettin confused wif POA. im dead. =x
no assembly today. hahas. dat was wat i wished for. =)

yupp. i was happy today. but juz for 10 mins.
i duno y.. i juz cant forget wat i saw today morning.
fark it. hais.. i waited outside der klas to c him.
but wat i saw.. hais. damn it.

work was rather borin.
but sook and jas added fun to it. thanks guys.
but i tink i made der 'boss' angry. =s
lols. too bad lor. der most, dun work~ no big deal.

i saw a bright star today.
i reali hope u saw it too..
i wanna be der star dat brightens up ur nite.
to show you der way home when u feel lost.
to give you warmth when you feel cold at nite.
i dun wish for more. juz let me be by ur side..
to be with you thru thin and thick.

p/s. lalala~ cheefun, canot backk out okie? i oso nvr back out.. how can you? you are a guy.. lols. =p.

lalalas.~x))

hahas. i was super 'high' ytd nite.
gees. thanks ehh. u noe hu u r larr. x)
but today mornin i was damn damn sleepy.
thanks to der rain.. lols..
i really didnt feel like goin o skool today.
but too bad, i had no reasons. hais..

hmmm.. today's geog test was rather okie..
hahas..but i tink i wont be able to make it for SS common test tml. lols.
gosh. im startin to get confused wif P.O.A.
and needless to say, i dun even understand Amaths. lols..
hais.. which one shld i drop? =/

arghh. i dun wanna go skool tml.
but i cant. need to learn my commands tml.
and help to clean guide room.
and oso, i wan c him.. x)
zZzz. sians. i nvr c him today~ argghh.
im goin crazyy. and im lookin towards friday. lalala~

im gonna clear my mind soon.
im gonna get you off soon.
and i mean it. i dun wanna miss you.
and i'll try my best not to.
gonna say byebye to u soon. =)

lalala~ finally i realised dat cheefun is smart. but i guess its only for one day.. hahas.. and u trust me, im gonna prove you wrong one day.. x)) if i haf der chance.. =)

* farkedupp. =/

arghh. i lost my wallet ytd.. fark lehh..
hais.. lucky dere wasnt alot of money in dere..
but, my ez link card and my neos. hais..
sad case.. * sighs.

argh. today moodswing.
PE was rather fun.. lols..
we playedd captain's ball and we had a great luff.
i lurfe monday PEs. x)) *grins.
but lessons were borin as usual. lols.

ahhh~ went to dentist today. oh gosh.
i dun dare to go to a dentist anymore..
damn farkin pain lorr.. hais..
he cut my infected nerve out. gosh.
i cried. lols. and i scaredd der dentist i guess.. hahas..
my teeth is achin now. gosh..

mayb we are juz not meant to be.
not now, not tml, never ever..
mayb u were juz meant to be my fren.
not best fren, not close fren, juz a fren..
mayb we arent even frens.
not in der past, not present, only in my dreams.

- i guess mayb xiao di was rite. forget.

arloes.

here again. gees.
i juz reach home not long ago..
went to meet my cousin after guides..
hais.. so tiredd. gosh.

outdoor cooking was rather fun larr.
we cookedd der whole raw chicken.. hahas.
can u imagine? its gross. but der products were great..
all of der chicken were nice.. and presentable i can say.. gees.

sze. i promise u.
u'll be der most xing fu PS.
gees. lurfe ya. =)
i lurfe all der guides too. =))

- hais. i reali hate you. i duno. but i juz cant stop hatin you.. you juz seem like a bloody freakin flirt to me.. i cant imagine a gurl lidat seriously.. no offence but you r a disgrace to gurls i can say.. all i can say is dat u r cheap.

hais. sometimes i feel so stupid.
duno wat am i waitin for.
sittin in front of der comp juz for one reason.
you-
i noe im wastin time. but cant do anythg.
i noe dis is dumb. but i cant help it.
i blame myself. i juz cant get over you.

* tiredd.

wahhs. im so early today.. hahas..
ltr gonna go guide hse for outdoor cookin course. sian.
i slept rather early ytd..
i tink shall not lie on my bed anymore if i dun feel like slpin..
i fell asleep juz lidat.. gosh..

okie. actually im here to blog bout ytd cuz i didnt haf a chance to last nite..
yups. im promotedd. but der results, aint dat good..
dun really wanna tok about it larr..
but i've got Sze as my PS~ anint dat great? gees.
and, sry tze bout dat hug.. i didnt noe it'll cuz 'tsunami' lols.
cheer up, deres still a chance yea? gees.
weishi, dere's no need to feel guilty..
all u need to do now is to do a good job and not dissapoint her..=)

yups. somehow i scolded putri..
for not being promoted. i noe it aint her fault..
but seriously i haf lots of confidence in her..
all she need to do is to be less playful and
let ms ho like her.. dats kinda difficult larr.
but i noe she can do it..
p/s. putri, dun make me dissapointed okie? dun make me cry. =x

after dat was a PLC meetin.
im der DM. wif Dewi.. hahas..
im gonna be real strict yea? bleah`s. =p
and last of all, somehow im missin der sec fours now..
joanna, jingyi and melvina, muz come back k? lols

*freak.

my mood today is super duper bad..
i shall blame it all on PMS. lols.
but, thanks manda for accomanyin me eh..? gees.
you've cheered me up. x)

today's racial harmony day.
yupp. somehow, its borin larr.
except dose interestin costumes.=))
yup. assembly sux. really..
arghh. im damn bloody pissed off. gosh.

oooh. started workin today. gees..
im STRESSED. lols. uncle hendry was luffin at me..
cuz my hands were shakin i guess.. lols.
im afraid dat i'l juz scratch der fone and dats it.. lols.
but, its fun lar somehow.. hahas. but im scaredd. x))

how i wish u'll be here everyday, to cheer me up..
i dun wanna tell u dat im havin a bad day..
cuz i dun wanna noe how muc h u dun care..
i dun wanna be always happy in front of u..
cuz i dun wanna fake it.. i wanna be me..
but i cant. im afraid of der all 'i dont care.'s.

* sians.

hahas. nvr go skool today. =)) but, i tink i'll rather go skool Yeoman service sux.. it was damn freakin boring.. gosh. i was yawnin continuously for around 1 or 2 hrs.. only der last part was nice.. all their performance were great.. gees.

but i returned to normal state during breaks.. lols. der breaks were ultimately fun..we went mac for breakfast and kfc for lunch.. lols. sze, jesse, gwen, weishi and me had lots of fun.. and jesselyn and gwen practically went crazy. lols.. both of dem crapped ALOT. lols..

i really wonder when are we gonna change place. =/ lols.
- ehh. cheefun, u better not lemme c u in skool tml k? lols.

yupp. u really wont care.
u really wont bother.
mayb he was rite..
shld noe when to let go..
let go whenever u feel dat u shld..
but lettin aint dat easy eh? =/

* yawns.

wahh. so tiredd. lols..
hmmm. lessons today- so-so bahh.
-chem sux.
-flunk a-maths test. x))

after skool went to meet uncle stehphen. wif sook, sher, jas.pang & ning.. pearl reach earlier den us. he reali treat us lunch~ gees. at pizza hut. i tink he had a hole in his pocket x)). lols. but he's reali a nice fella. =) gees..

after lunch, i came home and change den go and meet Jy lerr. we went to watch der preview of 'bug me not'. gosh. der bugs are soo cute~ and chen poling[i tink sth lidat.] was sooo shuai. gosh.. its reali a nice show.. gees. thnks Jy. =)

hmmm. dunid to go skool tml. got yeoman service. im happy, cuz i can skip alot of lessons.=) im sad, cuz im gonna miss pe. and him. =p lols. i tink its gonna be tirin lehh. its like, 730- 530. sooo long. gosh. hais.. but nvm larr. can skip skool.=) hahas.

how i wish i am der one.
but i guess i'll nvr be.
whenever i listen to der song..
my tears juz keeps rolling down..
im not a crybaby. but i juz cant help it. =(

* arloes. x)

gees. now im home. lemme blog in full details.. lols.. yupp. i was supposed to go somewhere wif sr & ws wif mdm sia. but end up mdm sia rold us dat sth cropped up so we didnt go lorr.. dats y i ended up in hayley's hse. kana lock outside der door somemore. lols.

yups. i had pe today. *grins. i lurfe it.x)) bleah`s. and lessons today are borin.. except physics bah i guess. Mr yeo's a little crazy today i guess.. lols. had a great tok wif xiao di today. thanks eh.. =)

jas. pang juz called me and said dat tml we are not havin trainin.. but uncle stephen's gonna treat us lunch.. hmmm.. weird ehh? lols.. i oso duno y. i haven even start work yet.. lols.

u'll never know wats behind der smile.
all der sorrows, pain and hurt..
u'll never understand how i feel.
even if u do, u wont bother i guess.
u'll never know how much tears i've shed.
cause even me, myself cant recall..

* grins.

gees. im at hay's hse now. gees.
so happy. she juz taught me A maths
and guess wat? i understand lehh. gees.
hais. i guess i gotta blog again when i reach home.
hayley's chasin me home~ *sobs.

* grins.

ive finally bought my shoebag. =))
but today's a boring day. =(

oh ya. not forgettin one thing.
wilber is real cute.
i lurfe him ~! muackks.
im a no. 1 wilber fan forever. ~ x))

whenever i tink of u, it hurts.
den i came to realise dat
in ur mind, its only filled wif her..
juz being by ur side is wat i always wished for.
even if dere'll be complete silence.
even if u mite be tinkin of her..
i dun bother. i dun care.
all i need u to noe is dat.
- i like you. i miss you.

*sians.

wahh im so tired today.
but i enjoyed my day.
thnks to we, sr and jy. =))

i duno wat to do seriously.
a friend, or a foe?
i duno wat she's up to oso.

i hate myself for missin you.
i hate myself for liking you.
i juz juz cant stop myself,
from doin those...

- good luck for tml =p
protect urself pls.

*pissed.

i almost wanted to pon skool today but i didnt.
all i did was pon eng. lols..
ALOT ppl pon eng today i can say..
and it was reali fun. we reali enjoyed ourselves.
we were toking bout.. err. ghost..? lols.

i hate to be stared by ppl.
it makes me feel like a freak.
somemore its not one at a time. lols.

went for trainin today..
yupp. it was kinda nice.
i lurfe uncle hendry.=))

gosh. im so pissed. i reali duno wat to say. its like.. its der way i express myself.. if u r not happy den, sry, i cant do anythg.. but, if dere's anythg, y dun u juz say it straight..? i didnt so anythg wrong to offend u.. thnks for ur concern, but i dunid all der comments.. and u duno der real reason behind it. so, dun judge me. its no monkey show..

p/s. thnks er zi for cheerin me up ytd and coolin me down today. =)) lurfe ya.

gosh.
cip was so tiring..
almost died. shirts are so heavy.
after dat sze, tze, jesse, gwen & me had a long chat. lurfe it.

i juz had a bad day today.
mayb i shall juz skip it nxt time round.
so dat i wont hear anythg.
so dat i wont c anythg.
i shldnt be dere.
i shld be blind. so dat i c nth.
i shld be deaf. so dat i hear nth.

`will u ever care? no, u wont.
will der day come dat u'll care? no, dere wont.
i miss you. i reali do. but
i hate it. i hate myself. i hate everythg.
i reali do.

* ouchh.

ahhh. sth happened to my back today durin PE.
i dun exactly noe wat happen actuali..
i juz noe i played captain's ball den i bend down..
den dats it. very pain liao.. hahas..
very very pain lorr. like wan die liao lidat..
lols. i was complain thru out der rest of der lessons..
i cant bend down now. =((
` but my er zi say wan pei me go c doctor if im not okay tml still.=))

my mum is drivin me crazy.
i didnt do anythg wrong..
but when i reachedd home,
she screamed at me like some crazy bitch
and find stupid reasons to scold me. wtf.
im so pissed. feel like slappin her.
but too bad she's my mum.

i duno y but i miss him like hell.
i duno y but i reali wanna c him now.
i hope i can. but i noe i cant.
i duno y but i wanna tok to him.
but i duno wat to say. im useless.

*yawns.

im so damn tired today..
i reached home at 12 plus las nite..
went to attend a funeral..
it was der biggest funeral dat ive ever attended..
hais.. bobian.. rich ppl.. wat to do..

i almost slept in every teacher's period..
guess i was too tired.. but except one im soo energetic..
PE lesson.. gees.. i was soo hyper.. gees..

yup. sry guys.. sry for letting u guys worry for me..
and i guess i wont do it again lerr..
and thnks for being dere..
im reali glad dat u guys care..
and thnks cheefun for spendin time to tok to me.. i'll rmb all dat u've said.. and i'll keep my promise.. =)
thnks guys. lurfe ya.

yoohoo~

went town wif dewi today.
hahas. we had fun.
i bought a tank top. i love it.
and finally i've got it. gees.

but der fun didnt last long.
she received a fone call and she need to go.
before dat we went for shoe hunt.
and guess who came to pick her up?
my favourite guy~!
all thnks to dewi i can c him..
and all thnks to dewi im so jealous now. =x lols
im juz kiddin. x))

oooh.

class was borin as usual today.
but eng lesson was kinda funny.
lols. somehow its enjoyable lar.

im so tiredd today.
went for guides.. missed cip..
somehow we had a 'be prepared test'.
my grp's task was to pitch a 8 men canvas tent.
gosh. i've nvr built a tent until so pissed and tired before.

guides ended at around 7 today.
after we take down der tent, other guides presented their proposals.
yup. had a nice meetin today i guess..


` i duno y but i juz cant smile.

arloes.

yupp. der game is over now.
guess der score? 2/10.
gosh.. how pathetic.
but sumhow after ytd, i didnt haf high expectations.x))

i didnt slp much today. so tired..
i duno y. but suddenly i miss him like hell.
gosh. i goin crazy. arhhh~ =x
i miss basketball too. hais..
i tink im alr crazy. belief it anot.


belief it anot. u are der cause of dis. not u, but u.

wahahs.

im watchin 'coffee talk and hawker woks' now.
and sly is soooo cute~! lurfe him loads!
he's allergic to prawns but yet he ate it.
he used to cut his sister's barbie doll's hair when he's young.
how cute. lols..

i had a great afternoon today.
3 and a half hrs of slp.. hahas..
i guess my life is juz so meaningless..
i got totally nth to do eveyday while my frens seems busy..
is dere sth wrong wif me..? gosh.. die..

hais;

im so disappointed.. u guys juz didnt realise.
i tot u guys will notice it 1st.. but im afraid im wrong.
it was others hu noticed it.. but, nvm.
dere's still tml. but i tink it'll be der last..
once tml is over, der game is over. =))

boo`s.

i had a great day today~!
but mornin was kinda bored.. cuz of guides..
but i love wat we did.. tentage.. gees..

after guides, sze, tze, gwen and me went for lunch..
den we met glad and meiping..
den der 6 of us went for ice cream..x))
hahas.. we had lotsa fun down dere.. esp tze and me..
we 'drank' ice cream.. cuz itt was soooo tall..
we are juz sick and tired of diggin.. lols..

i watched war of the world today..
wif gwen and weishi.. i love it..
its excitin plus funny.. hahas..
after der movie, 3 of us walk 3 or 4 busstops down..
den we realised dat no bus to take home.. piangg..
den we end up take cabb lorr.. lols..

*i strongly recommend der movie 'war of the world'.

`grins.

gees. today got youth day celebration.
its kinda borin and fun too thou.
after dat was reali fun.

gwen, glad, meiping and me went crazy.
we tortured someone. Jonathan.
haahs. we had a great luff..
i almost died.. it was reali fun..
we had broomstick fights and bag hunt..
lols.. but somehow, i pity jonathan..x))

heyyas. x))

gees.. my luck is reali down. =((
hais.. it hasnt been good since der 1st dat of skool..
sucks.. i dun tink anybody more suay den me lerr bah.. lols..

is it der eyebrow prob? =/